El Clasico, Eish Clasico and Alex Clasico: who's going to win what

IT’S that time of year for the football-speaking world as the end of season crowds gather. The reigning season.

Let me draw your attention to the big ones. The title-deciders I was asked to talk about on South Africa’s eNews channel this morning, with Mr William Lehong and his perfect suit. El Classico at the Nou Camp, the self-styled Eish Clasico in Soweto and the Sir Al Clasico in Manchester.

Let us for a moment skip past the Champions League semi-finals, difficult though that is. Real Madrid go to Bayern Munich tomorrow night in an attempt to stop the Germans, currently second to Dortmund in the Bundesliga, from engineering a home final in May.

On Wednesday, Barcelona are off to London, where Chelsea at Stamford Bridge may be a stumbling point. Unfortunately, the Blues are coming off the back of an excruciating 5-1 win over Spurs, with Drogba, Lampard, Ramirez and Malouda joining referee Martin Atkinson on the scoresheet in the FA Cup semi-final at Wembley. The Nou Camp could be disastrous for Roberto di Matteo.

Few would bet against an all-Spanish Champions League final, but for both the La Liga giants, Europe pales into insignificance on Saturday, when Jose Mourinho’s all-whites travel to the heart of Catlunia and the blue-and-red Nou Camp.

Has there ever been a bigger El Clasico? With Cristiano Ronaldo and Lionel Messi both breaking the all-time La Liga scoring record of the weekend – they’re locked on 41 each – the stage is set for something extraordinary.

I’ve spent most of today writing for The New Age about this extraordinarily odd couple. Modest, unassuming Messi, 24, with his growth hormones and crap hairstyle against flashy, sports car-crashing Ronaldo, 27.

And on the sidelines, the relatively sane Pep Guardiola versus the madness that is Jose Mourinho, who recently missed his 45^thpre-match press conference (the Spaniards count these things).

But before that little lot, we’ve got South Africa’s own title showdown: champions Orlando Pirates, holders of all the nation’s domestic trophies, against upstarts Moroka Swallows in Dobsonville.

Soweto’s oldest derby comes at an intriguing time. Eish. Gordon Igesund has turned the Dube Birds from relegation fodder into title contenders in just over a year. Peruvian caretaker Augusto Palacios has taken over from Brazilian Julio Leal with surprising aplomb in Orlando. A win over the Buccaneers, unlikely though it may seems, would put Swallows within a point of the lead.

With the ancient Siyabonga Nomvete, the SAPL’s top scorer, up against the bang-from-suspension Benni McCarthy, it’s not quite Messi v Ronaldo, but it’ll do for us!

And then, on May 30, the English showdown of note. Manchester United travel to Eastlands, Manchester City’s home at the Commonwealth Games Stadium.

After their glitch against Wigan, United bounced back with a 4-0 destruction of a pitiful Aston Villa on Sunday. Wayne Rooney, subbed and chastised against Wigan, scored twice. Ashley Young did one of his gold medal winning dives. Sir Alex chewed gum and admitted Young “might have overdone it”.

City meanwhile, are on a roll with Mario Balotelli suspended. Carlos Tevez, a footballing slave I have always defended, scored a hat-trick in their 6-1 win over Norwich. I guess the former United striker would love a couple more where they came from against Sir Alex.

Sir Alex said after the weekend’s fun and games: “We’ve got a nice healthy lead, but the derby is bound to have an impact on the the eventual winners.”

In Spain, the gap is four points. In South Africa, it’s the same. In England, it’s five.

These are the three big ones, El Clasico, Soweto’s oldest derby and the Manchester showdown. My picks? Real Madrid to get at last a point at the Nou Camp, Swallows to stun the Buccaneers, City to edge United at home. But the title winners? Jose Mourinho, Gordon Igesund… and, yet again, Sir Alex Ferguson.

You can follow me in www.thenewage.co.zaand on www.twitter.com/nealcol. But don’t be scared to leave a comment…

Four out of four for England in Europe... but will United v City confirm the Premier League is the world's No1?

It’s a little ditty unlikely to emerge as a chart-topping single, but when Gooners sing “one-nil to the Arsenal” they know a job has been done in the old, unfussy style once the domain of north London’s highly-successful red-and-whites.

They were chanting the old mantra after the streaky 1-0 win over Marseille at the Velodrome on Wednesday night, just as they did in 1993 when George Graham’s defensive-minded side overcame a highly-talented Parma in Copenhagen to win the now-defunct European Cup Winners’ Cup.

It was that strange winter, when Graham had a solid defensive unit built around David Seaman, Lee Dixon, Nigel Winterburn, Steve Bould, David O’Leary and Martin Keown, when Arsenal fans coined their chant. Back in the days before Arsene Wenger’s neat, attacking style, Gooners were proud to frustrate the opposition and hit them with a single, late goal – more often than not from a corner.

Based on French giant’s PSG’s “Allez Paris Saint Germaine” chant, you’d have thought that, under Wenger, Arsenal were no longer interested in singing about dour 1-0 victories. You’d be wrong. At the heavily under-reconstruction Velodrome on Wednesday night against an Olympique Marseille going through all kinds of problems of their own, the old resilience was back.

Given that Wenger’s fancy fantasy football approach has failed to yield a trophy since the 2005 FA Cup triumph over Manchester United, Aaron “Rambo” Ramsey’s late, late bombshell was all that was needed to resurrect the old Graham mantra.

And of course Arsenal’s win over the group leaders was not the only Premier League victory of the night. Chelsea, coming up quickly on the rails in the domestic title race, thumped in five without reply against Belgian outfit Gunk, sorry Genk, to complete a perfect week for English fans.

Both Manchester outfits, City and United, managed to win their first Champions League games of the season on Tuesday night. The current top two in the EPL, winless in Europe before this week, were also reliant on late goals before their crunch Manchester derby on Sunday.

And amid the flurry of “our Premier League is the best in the world” responses to the week’s Champions League results, comes this daring boast from Manchester City’s Dutch clogger Nigel De Jong.

Rendered infamous for his kung-fu antics during last year’s World Cup final against Spain, De Jong, 26, goes into the Old Trafford clash on Sunday insisting: "Of course everyone at City believes we can go there and win. We're going there as No 1 and the aim is to stay No 1.

"The pressure is still the same as it was last year. But what has changed is that we are now No 1 in the league going into this derby.

"We don't have any point to prove. We've shown our quality throughout the season. We don't need a game against United to show how good we are - it's two of the best teams in England going up against each other and I expect it to be a great game.”

De Jong also responded to Arsenal boss Wenger’s claims that players – particularly former Gooners Emmanuel Adebayor, Gael Clichy, Samir Nasri and Kolo Toure perhaps – only join City for Sheik Mansour’s oily millions.

He said: "You have to be honest, they pay good wages and everyone can earn a good living here — but it's not about that.

"This side can be part of history as well because it's been so long since we won the title. That's the main reason myself and other players signed here."

And De Jong has a point. United have looked a little dodgy of late. They threw away a two-goal lead against Basle, hardly sparkled against novices Norwich City and needed two late Wayne Rooney penalties against gladiatorial Galati this week.

Will the balace of power change in Manchester on Sunday? Will City and United produce the kind of derby which convinces the world the English Premier League is the world’s dominant domestic force? Watch this space.

My prediction? United 2-1. City boss Roberto Mancini may have produced the moment of the week when with his delirious celebrations after the late winner over Villarreal on Tuesday night, but in truth he is hardly fit to lace Sir Alex Ferguson’s dancing shoes.