A buzzing capital city, a sold-out stadium, a rousing triumph: Usain Bolt is not alone

Fastest man on the planet: Usain Bolt on Sunday night

What a showdown: a sold-out stadium in the capital with support split evenly between the two big guns of their sporting sphere. The long-awaited clash of the titans. And almost from the start, just one dominating force; unstoppable, devastating. In the end it was a no-contest, a crushing victory which will live in the sporting memory for years to come.

But perhaps we should leave Kaizer Chiefs to lick their wounds rather then re-live the events of Loftus Versfeld on Sunday, where big-spending Mamelodi Sundowns cruised to an emphatic 4-1 win over the mighty Amakhosi.

With Thamsanqa Sangweni, Tebogo Langerman, Lebohang Mokoena and the impressive Edward Manqele all scoring before the 37^thminute, many were considering calling in the army to protect the senseless slaughter of the hapless Zebras.

Yes, the season-opening MTN8 quarter-final – which also produced wins for Orlando Pirates, Moroka Swallows and SuperSport United – was quite something.

As I predicted last week, Sundowns’ Dutch coach Johan Neeskens left new Chiefs boss Stuart Baxter clutching at straws like this: “If we could have kept it in reach when we came in at half-time, we could have turned a few things around and maybe would have had a chance in the second-half.

"This result tells you that we have a lot of work to do. We'll lick our wounds, we'll sharpen our knives again and we'll get back to the job. It's certainly not going to be a pleasant evening."

In fact, for most sports lovers, it was a very pleasant evening as we went on to that other clash of the titans in another capital – London, which is in the midst of a ridiculously entertaining 30^thsummer Olympics.

In the sparkling new stadium in run-down Stratford, South Africans were riveted by the men’s 100m final which saw the showman Usain Bolt justify his arrogant pre-race antics with a sensational victory over fellow Jamaican Yohan Blake. To have confidence like that, the bloke has to be running world records at every training session, despite his recent injury problems.

Whilst proving lightning Bolts CAN strike twice, Bolt’s first-ever successful defence of the defining event of the modern Olympiad saw a record SEVEN men break the 10 second barrier.

Bolt’s time of 9.63secs was a new Olympic record but just a stride short of his world record 9.58. That wasn’t the point: "I’m one step closer to become a legend,” he said, “This means a lot, because some people were doubting. A lot of people were saying I wasn't going to win, I didn't look good. There was a lot of talk.

"It's an even greater feeling to come out here and defend my title and show the world I'm still No. 1. So I'm happy with myself."

Bolt isn’t entirely content though. Here’s what he said about the security in London: “I was in the line, we were waiting to run and the guy was telling me to line up straight. I was like, ‘Really? We’re about to run and they are going to make me stand in a straight line?’ There are just some weird rules here.

“Then they saw my skipping rope. They said I can’t bring it in, and I asked, ‘Why?” They just said, ‘It is the rules.’ So if I have a rubber band that I need to stretch, I can’t take it in. And when I asked why, they say, ‘It’s just the rules.’ It’s just some weird small rules that don’t make any sense to me, personally.”

And so ended another weekend of frantic Olympic gold mining. South Africa’s Oscar Pistorius made history by becoming the first amputee to compete in the Olympics, Kenya did the traditional thing in the 3,000m steeple-chase, Great Britain’s Andy Murray crushed Roger Federer to win gold at Wimbledon, the drunken fan who threw a bottle at the 100m starters was soundly thumped by Dutch judoka bronze medallist Edith Bosch, who tweeted: “Een dronken gast voor mij gooit een flesje op de baan!! IK HEB HEM GESLAGEN. Ongelofelijk!!”

Most South Africans will understand that to mean: “One drunken guest in front of me threw a bottle on the track. I WHACKED HIM! Unbelievable.”

And after translation, a little lesson in spelling. Note the difference between the following two sentences: South Africa has won gold. Australia has one gold.

In fact, South Africa has a record-equalling three golds and one silver so far. And we still have Richard Murray (triathlon, today), Sunette Viljoen (javelin, Thursday), Bridgitte Hartley (women’s K1 500, Thursday), Siphiso “Skizo” Nhlapo (BMX, Friday), Caster Semenya (800m, Saturday) and Bury Stander (mountain biking, Sunday) to come.

Yes, Team South Africa have pleny to look forward to. And I offer the estimated 15 million devastated Amakhosi this: “Khosi 4-1 life!”

Baltimore Bullet v Durban Dynamo: how Chad le Clos and Michael Phelps will cause butterflies around the world tonight

Golden Touch: Le Clos and Phelps after Tuesday night

A WEEK ago, the very suggestion that South Africa would grind to a halt on a Friday night to watch two men butterflying twice up and down a swimming pool would have been laughed out of Soccer City.

Then along came Chad le Clos and his dad Bert.

When the Baltimore Bullet takes on the Durban Dynamo at London’s sparkling new Aquatics Arena tonight at 8.38pm in a rematch dubbed The Man With The Golden Touch II, the Rainbow Nation will stop to see if Kwaaaaa-Zulu’s 20-year-old can edge out the 28-year-old superstar once more.

I’ll be at the Parlotones “This Is My Story” concert at Monte Casino when the 100m butterfly final gets underway. I have just sent them a polite request to stop the music and put South Africa’s fourth medal of London 2012 live on the big screens during the concert.

Will they PUSH ME TO THE FLOOR? I think not. That would be a GIGANTIC MISTAKE. Bert will be saying BABY BE MINE.

On Tuesday night the Parlotones did exactly that at the Queen Elizabeth Hall in London, as ex-pat South Africans gathered to hear their favourite band – and paused briefly to see Le Clos produce a remarkable last-gasp win over the world’s greatest Olympian.

Tonight they’re at it again, this time over two lengths rather than four. And my, how international perceptions have changed since the 200m butterfly final. Phelps has gone on to break the Olympic records of most medals won and most golds garnered.

And with a little help from his dad, Chad has become a global brand. When he beat Phelps to the final touch in the 200m, the commentators were harping on about the great man’s “rookie mistake” and “controversial defeat”.

At the 100m semi-finals last night, with the two golden heroes in separate races, the commentators whispered: “I wonder if Phelps will hear the foot-steps of Le Clos in the final stretch tomorrow night,” and they lauded the performance of South Africa’s swimmers, pointing out that, like France, the men from the tip of the dark continent had altered swimming’s balance of power for good.

And of course, everyone was asking: Where’s Bert. That’s Chad’s dad, the bearded beauty whose post-gold chat with the BBC’s Clare Balding has become he talking point of the games. Bert hailed his son as “beautiful” four times, he used the word “unbelievable” six times and generally restored the world’s faith in father-son relationships.

Bert will be there tonight. The cameras will no doubt capture his antics in the stands as Chad goes for a second win and a record fourth gold for South Africa – with the athletics events barely underway in Stratford.

Phelps, who has seen off a tiring Ryan Lochte as the male star in a world-record studded week of action in the pool, has been highly complimentary of Le Clos since his uncharacteristic defeat on Tuesday, tweeting: “What a performance from the South African. I’ve got to know him over the past year at a few photo shoots, he’s a hard-working, talented lad.”

And Le Clos has told us about his hero-worshipping of Phelps, whom he first saw winning at Athens, aged 12: “You have no idea what this means to me. Beating my idol. I can’t believe it.” After last night's semi, he said: "It's brilliant to be racing Phelps again, but I've already shaved half a second off my best time, I don't know if I can do any more."

Strangely, while Le Clos was forced to pull out of the 200m individual medley final to focus on the 100m butterfly and Lochte has over-stretched himself on all fronts, Phelps manages to look stronger as the week goes on.

With 20 medals behind him, Phelps goes in to tonight’s race slightly quicker than Le Clos. In the 200m butterfly on Tuesday, he started the final with a slightly slower qualifying time. I think Phelps has a tiny edge going in to tonight’s 100m final… but that’s what the bookmakers thought last time.

Tonight is about revenge for Phelps. Or another sensational upset from Le Clos. Either way, swimming and London 2012 will win.

And whatever happens, South Africa will have their fourth medal.

And then, of course, we’re in to the athletics. Flag-bearer Caster Semenya in the 800m, Sunette Viljoen’s world-beating javelin, long-jumper Khotso Mokoena looking to repeat South Africa’s only medal (silver) in Beijing and, South Africa’s best shot, the 4x400m relay where Oscar Pistorius, the legless Bladerunner, may run a lap.

And don’t foget Richard Murray in the triathlon on Tuesday, Siphiso Nhlapo on BMX next Friday and Burry Stander in the mountain biking on Sunday, the last day of the Olympics.

Successful Olympic teams tend to feed off each other’s success. Why should South Africa not do the same and take us to the SASCOC promised land of a record 12 medals?

South Africa's Oarsome Foursome: all you need to know about gold medal number three

Blazing paddles: Ndlovu celebrates gold

South Africa’s lightweight rowing four showed their golden touch in the water yesterday as they clinched a record-equalling THIRD Olympic title at London 2012.

In a dramatic last-gasp victory which pushes Team South Africa up to an unprecedented eighth in the medals table, Sizwe Ndlovu, Matthew Brittain, John Smith and James Thompson left the commentators spluttering with a sensational finishing burst to match team-mate Chad Le Clos’s golden 200m butterfly win over Olympic great Michael Phelps on Tuesday evening in the pool.

Former Pretoria policeman Ndlovu, 32, said afterwards: "This is so exciting, amazing...I took rowing up at school in 1997, and now I'm standing here. My brothers and sisters are supporting me back home.

"We stuck to our game plan. We knew Denmark would start strongly, and we had one call - to go for it in the last 500m. It worked.

"Rowing is big in schools but otherwise financially it's an expensive sport, this gold will be good for South Africa's rowing community and help give it a better image."

While the international feed warned us about Australia closing on the highly-fancied Denmark in the closing 200m, it was in fact the other side in gold and green who were sniffing a late surge to gold. South Africa were third at halfway and fourth at 1,500m but it was over the fateful last 500m that the oarsome foursome produced the blazing paddles.

Coached at Pretoria University’s High Performance Centre which also produced South Africa’s first gold medallist of London 2012 Cameron van der Burgh, they left first Australia, then the not-so-great Danes and hosts Great Britain in their wake.

As the lakeside erupted, South Africa finished in 6min 02.84secs, just 0.25secs ahead of Britain with Denmark taking bronze a further 0.07 seconds behind.

All the talk will now be of Ndlovu, also known as Lawrence, who became the first black African medallist in an boat Olympic boat. The oldest member of the crew at 32, he’s a former police reservist who worked, appropriately, for the Pretoria flying squad.

Born in Johannesburg, Ndlovu grew up in Newcastle, Natal but went to Mondeor High School south of Johannesburg, where he was introduced to rowing by the late headmaster Tom Price. He recalls: “Tom was actually the one who saw the potential in me and encouraged me to row. He used to pick me up in the mornings at 5am, make me train before classes, then go to school and also train in the afternoons. That was Tom Price, what a great man. He passed away in 2006.”

After over a decade of dedicated paddling at Roodeplaat Dam, he told Graeme Joffe before the Olympics: “Yes it took me 11 years to qualify for Olympics. The past two have been difficult. It is a tough event, but we are all equal, the boats are the same and it is just whoever is ready, whoever is more hungry.

“To qualify as a lightweight crew, we need to be 70kg, so we’ve had quite a bit to lose! Maybe one can weigh 72kg and we can donate amongst each other. So, if anyone is having a tough day, we share the weight and we work together to that.

“I don’t just row in a four. I came ninth in the World Cup in the single sculls in 2009. But I love the lightweight four. When things are going well, you are always going to love it and obviously if things aren’t going well, you aren’t going to love it. You are always going to blame three people but it has been good. I am enjoying it, I am loving it.”

Behind Ndlovu in the boat, Brittain, 25 from Johannesburg, lists his hobbies as cycling, swimming and rock climbing. His brother Lawrence Brittain who is also a rower and has represented South Africa at international level. Brittain won a gold medal with fellow golden boy Smith at the 2011 World U23 Championships in Brest, Belarus.

After finishing second to the Danes in Wednesday semi-final, Brittain said: "We don't chase the medal. We chase the good race and that's what gives us the good result."

Smith, 22, cut his hand in the semi, smearing his blood all over the boat. A Germiston lad, he also does a bit of male modelling.

Capetonian James Thompson, 25, learned to row at St Andrews College in Grahamstown where he also played rugby.

Nobody really expected a win for a four who came 11th at the past two World Championships – before they came in second in the World Cup regatta at Lucerne earlier this year.

Only one rowing expert really believed in their potential - Don Cech, now coaching rowing on the lake just outside Grahamstown where Thompson learned the trade - won South Africa’s only other rowing medal when he team up with Ramon Di Clemente for the men's pairs bronze at Athens 2004.

Chad's dad: the interview which wowed the Olympics... and your chance-by-chance guide to more South African medals

Unbelievable: Bert le Clos raving about golden boy Chad

IT’S being described in England as the best inerview of the London 2012 Olympics so far. The moment Bert le Clos, father of golden boy Chad, let it all hang out on the BBC.

Interviewed by Clare Balding high in the stands, bearded Bert could barely restrain himself after seeing the world’s greatest Olympian Michael Phelps beaten to the touch for a 200m butterfly triumph which secured South Africa’s best-ever double-gold start to a modern Olympiad.

Viewers around the world laughed and cried as Bert raved: "Unbelievable, unbelievable, unbelievable. I’ve never been so happy in my life. It's like I just died and went to heaven. Whatever happens in my life now, it’s plain sailing. It’s plain sailing.

“Unbelievable. He’s the most beautiful, down-to-earth boy you could ever meet in your life.

“Fabulous. My boy Chad? He's beautiful! What a beautiful boy! Sorry, sorry. Look at him! He swims like you can’t believe. I love you. Oh my God.

“My other son is here, the small one, he’s somewhere out there, I can’t find him. He’s all over the place, you know. It’s not easy to get tickets. Unbelievable. Thanks Great Britain. Thank you very much."

Proud dad Bert’s 1min 45sec video meltdown is, legally, unavailable to South African viewers. Hopefully some technical guru will sneak it on to our screens later today. His gruff South African tones reflect the pride of a nation as Le Clos added to compatriot Cameron van der Burgh’s world-record breaking win on Sunday night in the 100m breast-stroke.

Chad, 20, went in to London 2012 admitting: “My time will come at Rio 2016,” and the lad who matriculated from Westville Boys’ High in 2009 was nearly overcome by emotion when Nkosi Sikelel’ iAfrika echoed around the packed Aquadome for a second time in three nights.

As a stunned Phelps – later to win a record 19^thmedal in the 4x200m freestyle relay – threw an arm round his nemesis, Chad himself told the cameras: “To be honest I was lucky. Watching all Michael's races I know he finishes strong. It sounds crazy but I actually thought I was Michael at the last turn.

”Ever since I was 12, watching Athens 2004 when he won six gold medals, Michael has been an inspiration and role model.

"I have all his major races on my computer, I’ve watched the 100m butterfly final at Beijing 2008 a million times, when he beat Serbia’s Milorad Cavic by 0.01 seconds. I think I’ve seen that in seven different languages."

"When I turned there was a trigger point. I looked at him and I just thought I could try do something special. The last 25 metres were in slow motion and I just remember thinking to myself: ‘Don’t shorten up, keep it long.”

He did. And South Africans were treated to perhaps the most dramatic victory possible with bemused commentators raving about Phelps’s “rookie mistake”.

Le Clos could yet threaten the podium again in the final of Friday’s 200m individual medley. Remember, South Africa didn’t win a single gold in Beijing four years ago, where Khotso Mokoena’s long jump silver was the only thing of value brought home from a cheerless trip to China.

In fact you have to go back to Atlanta in 1996 to find a more successful gold haul, when Penny Heyns (two in the pool) and Hosiah Thugwane (marathon) triumphed in the USA.

Now South Africa, currently the leading African nation at the games of the 30^th Olympiad, stand on the verge of serious success. Tomorrow, the men’s lightweight four of James Thompson, Matthew Brittain, John Smith, Siswe Ndlovugo in to the final at Eton Dorney as fifth fastest qualifiers.

But given their second place at the Lucerne World Cup earlier this year, a medal is not beyond the realms of possibility. Remember, Le Clos was 50-1 to win gold against Phelps.

I’ve been to a couple of Olympics and witnessed how athletes feed off each other’s success in the village and around the venues. I suspect that may be the case here, with Team South Africa going in to the athletics on Friday with renewed confidence, real self-belief.

Sascoc’s predicted 12 medals remain a distant hope but I reckon South Africa could finish with ten gongs… and this is where the medals could be won:

Thursday 2: Rowing: Men's lightweight four: Brittain, Ndlovu, Smith, Thompson

Friday 3: Men's 200m Individual Medley: Le Clos

Saturday 4: Men’s long jump final: Mokoena

Sunday 5: Men’s 100m final (Usain Bolt) and women’s marathon with strong SA team

Monday 6: Men's 400m hurdles: LJ Van Zul

Tuesday 7: Men’s triathlon: Richard Murray

Thursday 9: Women’s K1 500: Bridgitte Hartley

Thursday 9: Women’s javelin final, Sunette Viljoen.

Friday 10: Men’s BMX final: Sifiso Nhlapo

Friday 10: Men’s 4x400m relay: four from Oscar Pistorius, Van Zyl, Fredericks, Ofentse Mogawane, Willie de Beer and Shaun de Jager.

Saturday 11: Final of women’s 800m: Caster Semenya

Sunday 12: Men's mountain biking: Burry Stander

The man with the golden touch: How South Africa's Chad Le Clos edged out Michael Phelps, the world's greatest Olympian

The man with the golden touch: South Africa's Chad Le Clos 

THERE will never be a more dramatic Olympic moment for South Africa than Chad Le Clos’s golden touch in the 200m butterfly at the glittering new London Aquatic Centre last night.

Sure, Cameron van der Burgh’s world record victory in the 100m backstroke was pretty special as he claimed Africa’s first medal of the 30^thOlympiad on Sunday night.

But it was the sheer drama of Le Clos’s triumph 48 hours later which makes South Africa’s second gold medal so special, so historic – and put the Rainbow nation ahead of Australia and hosts Great Britain on the medal table.

Afterwards, the 20-year-old from Durban sobbed through the national anthem before gushing: “Michael Phelps is my hero. I love the guy. I just wanted to race him in the final and I've beaten him. I can't believe it.

“It's been a dream of mine ever since I was a little boy. This is the greatest moment of my life. To beat Phelps, I can't believe it. You don't understand what this means to me.”

And of course, that’s the point. Phelps was the big character here. The world’s greatest ever swimmer was bidding to became the first male to win the same individual event at three Olympics.

Though it was given precious little hype by the local broadcasters, it was one of THOSE finishes. The kind you’ll remember with a huge grin when you’re old and cynical.

There was the greatest swimmer of all time, soon to be the greatest Olympian of all time, Michael Phelps cruising out in front. This was the night he would equal the great Russian gymnast Larisa Latynina’s all-time record of 16 gold medals.

And Le Clos, the lad who matriculated from Westville Boys in 2009 was trailing in third after two lengths against the man famous for winning tight finishes.

But unlike compatriot Van Der Burgh who is unbeatable over 50m in the breast-stroke, Le Clos is a strong finisher in the 200m butterfly. As they came down the last, he was third. Then second… and the commentators told us: “It’s Phelps, on his way to history. He’s got the lead, but is it a winning lead.  

“It’s going to be close, Phelps is hanging on, he’s a winner… does he touch? He DOESN'T. Le Clos GETS THE TOUCH! Incredible. The greatest swimmer we’ve even seen makes a rookie mistake.”

All around the pool – and all around the world – incredulity reigned. “The man who doesn’t make mistakes has made a mistake,” they told us, unsure how to find the words, unsure what to say about Le Clos, who was described as French by Reuters and Russian by USA Today’s tweets.

At one point, the commentators on the global feed told us about “Phelps’ controversial defeat” as if the great man had been wronged - but of course there was nothing controversial about it. He simply got done on the line by a youngster who said before London that he was “just warming up for Rio in 2016”.

To be fair, the commentators did manage to drag themselves away from Phelps for brief seconds: “You don’t get a bigger scalp ever than Michael Phelps,” was one effort, while they also applauded the emergence of France and South Africa in the pool.

Still, with the SABC and SuperSport sticking to the global feeds, the social networks were awash with complaints. And it was a full hour before we saw Chad again… for the medal ceremony. No attempt was made to get a microphone to Le Clos, despite the myriad of reporters sent to England for the Olympics.

Le Clos sobbed throughout the second rendition of Nkosi Sikelel’ iAfrika in three nights, and Phelps managed to keep a smile on his face throughout.

Twenty minutes later, Phelps and the USA went on to win the 4x200m freestyle relay from France while South Africa, with Le Clos swimming a game third leg, finished seventh. And all the talk was of Phelps again, as he drew within a single gold of the all-time record and became, with 19, the leading medal winner of all time with 19 of all colours.

And speaking of colour, many twats on twitter began asking if Le Clos was white or coloured. As I told them: he’s not black, white or coloured. He’s simply pure gold.

When London 2012 belonged to South Africa: and where the next medal will come from

Making his point: Cameron van der Burgh after winning Africa's first gold

SPINE-TINGLING moments are rare for South African Olympians. But for an all-too-brief 15 minutes on Sunday night, London 2012 belonged to the Rainbow Nation.
After two days of agony which saw cycling road race contenders Daryll Impey and Asleigh Moolman finish empty-handed and the women’s footballers Banyana Banyana knocked-out after defeats against Sweden and Japan, the promised land of 12 medals looked unobtainable.
Charl Crous (men’s 100m backstroke) and Wendy Trott (women’s 400m freestyle) finished last in their heats and when our much-hyped hockey girls were thumped 7-1 by Argentina, the social networks were abuzz with complaints from patriotic South Africans watching the games of the 30th Olympiad.
My reply was simply to point the twittering cynics towards a better time, a better place. Specifically 9.11pm at the sparkling new Aqua Centre in Olympic Park.
The night before, Van der Burgh left defending Beijing champion Kosuke Kitajima of Japan in his wake with an Olympic record 58.83secs in the 100m breaststroke semi-final. He went to London with the world’s fifth-fastest time but went in to the final as the fastest qualifier.
There was never any doubt that Van der Burgh – allegedly stronger over the non-Olympic 50m than he is over two lengths – would be South Africa’s first medallist in London. And there was no doubt he would reach the turn at the front of the field.
The surprises came with his enduring pace over the final length, the ease with which he won gold, and that world record finishing time of 58.46secs which left a stunned favourite Kitajima 1.33secs behind in fifth place with Australia’s Christian Sprenger taking silver and Brendan Hansen of the US in third.
The commentator screamed: “Van der Burgh is tiring, he’s a one-length specialist” but the truth was the 24-year-old had simply blown the rest of the world away and Australia’s Brenton Rickard was left trailing in sixth-place as his global mark was shattered by 0.12secs.
Afterwards the Crawford College old boy gasped: “The world record doesn’t matter. Just to be an Olympian, an Olympic champion, puts you in a club which nobody can take away from you.”
The beauty of Van der Burgh’s triumph lies in the fact that, unlike so many other South African swimmers, he is home-schooled. Cameron does his training at the University of Pretoria, as part of an academy which also saw AmaTuks graduate to the Premier Soccer League last season as well as producing top class tennis players and golfers.
In less than a minute, Cameron had won Africa’s first medal and improved on the entire South African medal haul from Beijing four years ago, where long-jumper Khotso Mokoena won a single silver in a bleak Chinese fortnight.
For the first time in eight years, Nkosi Sikelel’ iAFrika boomed out across an Olympic venue, and Van Der Burgh could barely keep his composure, taking huge breaths to keep the tears from overwhelming him.
Holding his emotions in check, he grinned: “I chose just the right time to swim the perfect race. That’s what I’ll be able to tell my children.”
Van der Burgh, who started swimming seriously at 11, confesses: “I love what I do and never feel like I’m actually working. Playing in the pool all day isn’t so bad.”
And now for further medals – 11 of them, if Sascoc are to maintain their optimistic schedule in London.
Cameron’s fellow swimmer Chad Le Clos, the 20-year-old from Durban, has chances after finishing an impressive fifth in the 400m individual medley behind American giant Ryan Lochte.
But even if Le Clos misses out in his favourite 200m butterfly tonight or the 200m medley on Friday, there’s always the men’s lightweight four in the rowing at Eton Dorney on Thursday where Lawrence Ndlovu, John Smith, Matthew Brittain and James Thomson are hoping to build on their second-place finish at the World Cup in Lucerne earlier this year.
But for real bullion, we need only look to today’s triathlon in the London docklands for medal-hungry South Africans.
That’s where South Africa have real medal hopes, centring on Richard Murray, the 23-year-old from Cape Town, who won the swim-cycle-run World Cup event in Hamburg on the Saturday before the Olympics, over-shadowed by Hashim Amla’s 311 not out and Ernie Els’ Open triumph.
By the time the athletics starts – with javelin thrower Sunette Viljoen, 800m champion Caster Semenya, Mokoena, the 4x400m men’s relay and 400m hurdler LJ Van Zyl all medal contenders – South Africa may well have a few more medals in the bag before Burry Stander’s mountain biking on the final Sunday of London 2012.
And as I write this column remember this: South Africa are currently leading hosts Great Britain in the medals table – Lewis Hamilton was the only British winner of the weekend. And his Grand Prix triumph came a distant 1 500km away in Hungary.

London 2012: what you can expect from tonight's Opening Ceremony

Breaking barriers: Roger Bannister

TONIGHT’S London 2012 Opening Ceremony gets underway at 9pm in Great Britain – 10pm in South Africa – with Danny Boyle’s lavish £27m production shrouded in secrecy.

Despite numerous rehearsals each witnessed by 60,000 people, the great event – and the identity of the torch-lighter – has been kept under wraps with those in the know proudly tweeting coded references with the hash-tag #keepthesurprise.

But utter secrecy cannot be ensured in the modern age of social networking when gossip crosses oceans faster than it used to cross the street. Especially when you have hundreds of nurses involved.

What we can say is that the ceremony will be packed with British cultural references which will completely bemuse those in South Africa and beyond.

There will be no jet-packed Ironman from Los Angeles 1984, nor the wall-running Superman from Beijing, the superheroes on show feature James Bond and Mary Poppins - though the visual effects from the superb South African 2010 World Cup opening will come in to play.

The production will start with Boyle, something of an anti-estblishment figure, dressing up the 65,000 capacity Stratford Stadium as England’s “green and pleasant land”. The grass and oak tree, plus traditional English rain clouds, are already in place. A 27-ton bell will get proceedings underway just hours after Big Ben five miles away bonged for ages to herald the games’ arrival.

We will see 12 horses, three cows, 70 sheep, three sheepdogs and a horse-drawn plough if the Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals doesn’t get involved. Despite rumours from New Zealand, the wooly, four-legged types won’t actually be competing in the 30^th edition of the modern Olympiad.

The “green and pleasant bit” also features families having picnics, milkmaids and, ironically considering it's not an Olympic event, a village cricket game with players in caps and braces.

All this will please the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge, Prince Harry, the Duke of Edinburgh, the Prince of Wales and the Duchess of Cornwall not to mention another 120 world leaders including Michelle Obama, Americans' first lady.

We were expecting to see invasions from horn-helmeted Scandinavian Vikings and Romans as Boyle takes us rapidly through a pastiche of British history… culminating in the 17^th Century Industrial Revolution. All the while, expect to see pretty young things dancing around the traditional pagan maypole with ribbons.

At one end of the stadium we’ll see an oak tree on a hill representing the history Glastonbury Tor, at the other end, something from Last Night of the Proms with musical backing featuring The Jam’s Going Underground and Vangelis’s classic sporting anthem, Chariots of Fire.

The transition from medieval Shakespeare (some of the early bits are based on a passage called Isles of Wonder from The Tempest) to Frankensteinian dark Satanic mills will shake up the crowd as we hit modern times, the bit the Conservatives in the current UK coalition government are most worried about.

At this point, expect labouring weavers, miners, steel workers and engineers backed by Lionel Bart’s Food Glorious Food, the Rolling Stones’ Satisfaction, and the Sex Pistols’ Pretty Vacant. Yes, the Sex Pistols. Punk rock, remember that?

The final segment revolves around two young girls going “out on the town” for a traditional Saturday night together. An army of real nurses – who have been rehearsing in a “Guantanamo-style” facility in dodgy Dagenham down the road – will lead a celebration of Britain’s National Health Service.

Then the iconic British references hit us hard and fast. Paul McCartney will sing “Hey Jude”, the great Beatles hit from the 60s, then the equally ancient pop group Mud will blast out Tiger Feet.

Expect to hear Relax by Frankie Goes to Hollywood and the late Amy Winehouse’s Valerie. And then witness “about 40” Mary Poppins figures, using umbrellas for parachutes, drop in to take on Harry Potter’s evil enemy Voldemort. Daniel Craig, who will be in the stadium, has pre-recorded a James Bond sequence for the Olympics, though there are some who believe David Beckham will leap out of the Bond-style helicopter live in the stadium.

The torch-lighting itself – which I believe will be carried about by Sir Roger Bannister, the 83-year-old who first broke the four-minute barrier for the mile in 1957 – involves a complex “fuse” mechanism which will burn a path along the hoardings to the permanent flame, which will be housed on the rim of the stadium roof at Stratford for the duration of both the Olympics and Paralympics for the next month.

Bookmakers stopped taking bets on Bannister blazing his octogenarian trail, though Queen Elizabeth II, King David of Los Angeles, decathlete Daley Thompson and Britain’s most successful ever Olympian Sir Steve Redgrave are also hovering hopefully with those boxes of very long matches.

And then, finally, the athletes enter. Caster Semenya will carry the flag for South Africa and Maria Sharapova will lead Russia as the 205 nations and most of their 100,000 athletes are encouraged to move swiftly around the track by a high-tempo march by Underworld, who featured on Boyle’s Trainspotting soundtrack. They've been politely asked NOT to delay proceedings by over-use of smart phones. Greece will lead the nations in, then everyone will be in alphabetical order until the hosts, Great Britain, enter last.

And, apart from a couple of speeches from International Olympic Committee president Jacques Rogge and London 2012 chairman Seb Coe, will be that.

The real start of the Olympics, the winning of the first goal medal, will take place tomorrow on The Mall, where the men’s roadrace ends after 250km involving multiple climbs of Boxhill in Surrey. Among the favourites? Mark Cavendish of Great Britain and Darryl Impey of South Africa, both fresh from the Tour de France.

Let the Games begin!